I'm on my fifth tube of GoGurt, it's been a rough week everyone.

I've been contemplating life questions. Such as my future, my social and emotional state, and where Oscar the Grouch goes to the bathroom.

Hate being a Debbie Downy with an extra frowny-face chromosome, but hey, I'm feeling much better. Just hit a bit of a bump, but fortunately I'm one of those rubber babies that just bounces back into life's arms after being dropped. Drawing things I like really helps me feel better, so look forwards to more art!! I just finished a piece and will be starting another shortly. Feel free to review if you wanna<3

See ya bums later B^)

Jesus Christ. It's 2017.

It's both a insane and really underwhelming thought. I mean, on one hand it's the year that a highschool senior like me has had to wear on my soul like a nazi armband for the past decade. To think that the year is finally here, well, it's a bit crazy to say the least. However, just because it's 2017 doesn't mean shit suddenly changed. Sure the number changed, but it's kind of hard to comprehend that a year symbolic of so much change has arrived when even my seat hasn't changed in the past 24 hours. And I'm pretty sure that corn chip stuck in my ass crack was from New Year's 2015.

All jokes aside, my life has changed a lot. Not because of 2017, but because of the point in life I have reached. I've never been so grounded in reality with so much to show for it. First off, my number one choice college has accepted me into their program and even threw a solid $13000 annual scholarship in my direction. Like, damn, that's one hell of a bone they throw me. That's some Flintstones shit right there. So, needless to say, I know where I'm going in life. And this is the most passionate and confident I've ever been in my artwork. For once in my life, I feel like the shit I make is something I can show the world without a horrible regret. 2016 was a fantastic year of artistic improvement, and I can't wait to see where 2017 takes those skills.

My social life is also pretty great. Sure, a lot of my friends have become distant and wrapped up in their own lives and some even decided to drop me like their drunken uncle dropped them as an infant. To them I say, whatever, fuck you, just don't come crying to me about "boohoo we should've hung out more because now we'll probably never see each other ever again." I'd be really lucky not see some of them ever again. But that's besides the point. The friends I have are ones I really appreciate. Nice people who I can count on for a laugh. Even better is the relationship I'm currently in. She's the best girl I could've asked for, and her company outdoes just about everyone else's. Because woah. She's lady jesus.

So, yeah, sorry for my latenight ramblings. I write these wall-shits purely for my own self entertainment. Because I know some time in the future, I'll be able to look back on this digital cringefest of diary and remember the good ol' days before I lived in a box.

I hope y'all had a great Christmas and an even better New Year.

SEE YOU FUCKS SOON! KISSES!!

If Santa Claus sees everything that means he sees you pee in the shower teehee. Hope you like coal for Christmas.

'TIS THE SEASON. So as we all know, Christmas is on it's way and everybody's getting gifts for each other in the spirit of not looking like an asshole!! Christmas is actually my favorite season though. It's the one time of year that perfectly pieces together the things in life I love. Good people, good food, good times, and maybe some cool new stuff. I could work at Hallmark with that attitude. I've decided to let the good spirit get to me and I'm going to be gifting artwork and stuff I've made and will have printed onto things like posters, phone cases, and clothing. It's gonna be one hefty task. Guess I'm a masochist when it comes to pens and paints. I've already got a lot of deadlines coming up. I'm running short on time and money but who knows- Maybe a wet kiss on the mouth from Santa man himself will give me enough Christmas magic to survive. In the mean time, it's up the the magic of holiday anxiety to give me the strength to succeed.

I'll be back soon. Keep my sleigh-seat warm, fellas!

Okay alright okay you guys fucking amped?? I'm fucking AMPED. The butterflies in my stomach are having an orgy right now you don't even fucking know.

For real though, here's what's up: I'm a SENIOR. Finally, the perfect excuse for bullying and public indecency. You say it's wrong my dick's out? I say my dick's a senior, so you can give it a discount on its coffee you freshman friday fag bag. I run this school now.

Senior year is pretty exciting to me to say the least. I've been participating a fuck ton, helping make a 5k and designing t-shirts for my school, not to mention being a yearbook editor who also gets to make the DAMN COVER. All I gotta do is put a sweet hentai babe on the front and I get a 5 out of 5 on Newgrounds. But you guys'll have to settle on a lame blue devil thing and some nature shit since the theme has to do with nature this year. Maybe I'll give the tree tits, lmao.

I've been a busy bee to say the least, but when you get a taste of this honey you're gonna pitch a tent from how dang good it is. Hopefully. A lot of it is promotional text designs and stuff for t-shirts so I can't and don't want to upload it. However, I've got like 15 new project ideas I'm working on for fun and I'll put those here!!! Also, I did a promotional thing for my AP Gov class I'm ashamed of (below).

Hope to be back soon!!!! Love U!!!

I been vacationing with friends and family for the past two weeks so I've had a tough time making time for actual art projects. I just uploaded one today though, so GO LOOK PLEASE: http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/supergoodpancakes

I ain't got important shit to talk about at all but it's almost 2 in the morning and I feel like I gotta keep this gravestone of a fucking profile alive. Because I at least hope that when it is one, that shit doesn't say "probably some faggot lmao." I'd love to make friends on this site, but every time I look at the forums, the little hamster running the wheel (that is my brain) suffers a stroke because I can't follow the way conversations happen here.

I'm hoping to continue uploading art here though and see where that gets me. Though, I'm starting to notice that unless your art is fucking flawless or beautifully stylistic, if you draw anything remotely ugly, you are FUCKED. I wonder how many people just browse through the art portal dick first. So maybe I'll just draw cute hentai girls until my adoring fans are forced to cream to whatever hellspawn I create on canvas.

Hello again, you delicious tank-obsessed fucks.

So, I've finally started to kick myself into high gear and get some art shit done. Frankly, I'm pretty proud of my recent results. They're not the utter shit stains of permanent marker that I sometimed tried to wipe up with watercolor. No, these recent pieces have been better, cleaner, and in TECHNICOLOR.

I'm mostly excited about my drunk stickers that I have been doing on-and-off over the past few months. You can see that here: http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/drunk-stickers-2 (These will be on sale if you are interested, just PM me for details.) I've also got a couple more pieces coming up real soon!!

So yeah I've basically been kicking myself in the balls to get some good work out. Hope y'all enjoy them and I plan on sticking around here a little more now.<333 So, yeah.

See you soon.

So, Newgrounds is great and all, and I'm really excited for Pico Day this year. However, I rarely use this site because I lack involvment with the community and my content combined with my work ethic isn't quite ready for a place like Newgrounds. Other websites, I can just post complete and utter garbage in between my good stuff and people still enjoy that. Although I'm still pretty shit, I have been making a strong effort to improve and even posted some more art. Check it out here: http://www.newgrounds.com/art/view/chat-man/fanbenders

I plan on making more digital pieces now that I've kind of figured out how the fuck to use an Intuos. I'll also hopefully purchase a Cintiq this summer if my summer jobs pay as handsomely as my family has informed me. Can't promise I'll be active on this site though, my life's got me elsewhere. Maybe once I'm the rich kid on the block with that fancy digital art thingy I'll be able to post regularly and stuff, but for now it takes me like months between uploads.

Love you, Newgrounds!!!!!!!! I'll be back soon, hopefully.

So basically I barely use this site since Instagram has kinda become a better platform for me to post my art on, (especially when no one really even views it here) but wanted to point out the fact that I am not dead. Rather, I've actually been quite alive and busy despite what a walking corpse I feel like at times. Nonetheless, I have finally obtained an Intuos Art and software to use so I can begin to learn how to make digital art. Because if there's anything I've learned from this site, it's that people only really give a shit if your art's digital. Otherwise you have to work like eight times harder for the same results. And that fucking blows.

ANYWHO Sex Cops will probably be back never unless I decide to do some sort of mini-comic. I've got newer ideas I feel more confident in that I will probably attempt to work on instead. In the mean time, I'll probably be practicing some digital dick doodles and doing fun watercolor shit as usual.

Catch you lovelies, later.

Wowee, my life sure doesn't go as expected. Guess I never got the memo that 11th grade requires an ass-ton of work, especially when you decide to take another year of Spanish and an AP course. Procrastination's gotta end here I guess. It was fun being 100% lazy while it lasted.

So where's Sex Cops??? Is Sex Cops still a thing??? Well here's the info. I did five pages like I said, but took way longer and y'know- I am very unsatisfied with it's quality. My art keeps improving and every page I've left behind makes it a little more evident. I'm unsure as to whether I should post it since I feel like even the best looking pages generally lack in quality that I wish to produce. I may post page 1, but no way in hell is that going in the portal. Sex Cops are going to remain simple OCs of my SUPER FUCKING HOT GIRLFRIEND and I until we think of some sort of script and get some actual fucking art stuff.

In the mean time, I will be working primarily with watercolor and sharpie. I'm working on a couple pieces and hope to finish and submit one soon. See you soon, qt's ;*